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Sylvia: “Dad, can you write in the dark?”

Dad: “I think so. What do you want me to write?”

Sylvia: “Your name on this report card.”


- Raj

Mother: “Why did you get such a low mark on that test?”

Junior: “Because of absence.”

Mother: “You mean you were absent on the day of the test?”

Junior: “No, but the kid who sits next to me was.”


- Anna

Teacher: “John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?”

John: “You told me to do it without using tables.”


- Lokesh

A college student in a philosophy class was taking his first examination.
On the paper there was a single line which simply said: "Is this a question?" - Discuss.
After a short time he wrote: "If that is a question, then this is an answer."
The student received an "A" on the exam.

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Teacher: Where is your homework?
Pupil: I lost it fighting this kid who said you weren't the best teacher in the school.

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Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room.
The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?"
One boy answers, "We found a ten dollar bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie."
"You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was."
The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.

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Teacher: Mary please point to America on the map.
Mary: This is it.
Teacher: Well done Mary! Now class, who found America?
Class: Mary did.

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Teacher: "Isaac Newton was sitting under a tree when an apple fell on his head and he discovered gravity. Isn't that wonderful?
"Student: "Yes sir, if he had been sitting in class looking at books like us, he wouldn't have discovered anything.

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Teacher: 'Sam, what is the outside of a tree called?
Sam: 'I don't know.'
Teacher: 'Bark, Sam, bark.'
Sam: 'Bow, wow, wow!'

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Principal: "I've had complaints about you, Johnny, from all of your teachers. What have you been doing?"
Johnny: "Nothing, sir."
Principal: "Exactly!"

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Teacher: You failed the Test

Raju: You failed to educate me.




Monday 20th of July 2015

- Ravi

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